Changes...or... A New Year, A New Me?

            Are you aware that change isn’t always pleasant?  Or fun?  And that learning new things can make you feel like your brain is jello?

           

            I said a few weeks ago that, things…they are a changing.  Boy, I had no idea!

            Now, I don’t necessarily believe that everything that happens to us is for a reason.  Pre-ordained, if you will.  This world is imperfect.  Sometimes we just get sick, or get a flat tire…or lose a job.  I know we can learn something from every occurrence if we will, but sometimes things just happen.  Then…there are those other times.

            A month ago I told you about Alana, my next door neighbor in the apartments I used to live in.  God revealed a missed opportunity.  He also showed me that I had judged Alana and found her now quite good enough to befriend.  Although, I’ve been known to staunchly defend the nameless, faceless less fortunate…or just someone who isn’t like me.  But give them a face, a name and maybe a few tattoos or a bandana, an unpleasant odor, or a vocabulary peppered with words that make me cringe and I tend to look away.  Not quite meet their eyes.  I might turn to get away from the smell.

            Lately, God’s been talking to me about sharing Him.  About what or who others see when they see me.  I’d like to think they see Jesus when they look at me. 

            I recently read a book that posed a challenging question.  What would happen if your heart got a day off and Jesus’ heart took its place…just for a day?  None of your circumstances changed; it would still be you but with Jesus’ heart walking through your day.  All of the seemingly insignificant words we say…would they still be said?  Might I spend an hour (or more) playing cards on the computer instead of making better use of my time?  Mmmmmm….it made me think.

            I’m sick…I think I have bronchitis.  But since I don’t have letters after my name...you know, like M.D., I need someone who does to write me a prescription.  And since I am new to town, with no regular doctor or insurance for that matter…I find myself at the local emergency room.  I have spent over 15 hours this week waiting for a doctor in the waiting area of said emergency room.  I asked God why I have to do this.  You know…kind of whined a bit.

            People here are different than me.  Most of them have a different skin color and at the very least, an accent when they talk.  And I don't mean Texan.  Some of them don’t even speak the same language.  Others have come in from the cold for a warm place to rest.  I can tell the guy next to me hasn’t cleaned up in a while.  Soon someone will come wake him for a ride to one of the shelters.  I heard Westside shelter is giving away some very nice clothes.  At least one of them I didn’t recognize as homeless because he was dressed so nice.  That was the one who is calmly convinced he’s got an intracranial brain bleed, and has very strong opinions of terrorists and alien life forms. 

            I’ve just come to try and convince someone to give me an antibiotic.  I’ll even tell them exactly what kind…if they’ll listen.  Somehow, I don’t see it happening exactly like that. 

            As I sat there, though for those 15 hours, I encountered drunks…in need.  A belligerent young homeless man looking for a cigarette…in need.  A sick gang member and his girlfriend…also, in need.  There was a mother with her little boy who was asking if his daddy’s was gonna wake up.  They were in need. 

            I look at the lady across the way who I think is homeless, and wonder what she would look like if her life circumstances had been different or what would I end up like if my circumstances were like hers?

            As I sit at my desk at work, I think to myself, I sure wish I could work with Christians or I wish I could encounter at the coffee shop folks getting together with their Bibles over a cup.  But Here is different from where I was before.  I don’t know why or what God has planned but I can tell he’s about to wake me up.  God didn’t intend for us to live in communes with only like-minded people around us.  He told us to be a light to others.  Matthew 5:14 & 16 says, “You are the light that gives light to the world.  A city that is built on a hill cannot be hidden.  ….  In the same way, you should be a light for other people.  Live so that they will see the good things you do and will praise your Father in heaven. 

            God also gave us Mark 16:15.  GO YE INTO ALL THE WORLD AND PREACH THE GOSPEL TO EVERY CREATURE.

            Ok, so we don’t all have to be preachers.  But we are supposed to let our lights shine.  Who am I supposed to let see my light?  Those folks in the E.R. or the people I work with every day. 

            God told me he’s doing a new work in my life.  I was thinking something along the lines of a quaint little house with trees, a fence, a place for flowers and then maybe a fella who adores Him, then me.  But instead, I think I better clean out my ears and put my glasses on so I don’t miss anything.  I’m in school!  Oh, I don’t doubt God has some wonderful things in store for me.  He’s shared a few of them with me.  But my purpose in life isn’t to keep God busy with my wish list.  I have a job.  I am an Illuminator.  And so are you.

            Heavenly Father, cause my ears to hear and my eyes to see your plan for me.  At least the next step you want me to take.  Lord, show me opportunities to share you and then the words and the courage to do so.  Thank you Father for letting me see you actually doing a work in my life.

           

           

         

  

           

A New Pair of Earplugs

            Today my Random Book of Devotions took me to Acts 26:13-19 where Paul is telling King Agrippa about what happened to him on the way to Damascus.  The whole point of the devotion today, is to tell your story to those God puts in your life.  Or your path.

            I love to talk.  I can get up in the morning with my motor revved and ready to talk your ear off.  If you know me at all, you probably know more about me than you want to.  I have no idea why I really feel you need and even want to know about my love affair with the color blue or with flowers.  But I do.  Lucky you!

            Now, when it comes to sharing my God stories, I clam up.  My co-workers don’t usually see God’s grace and power at work in my life.  I find it much easier to tell things about me that might make me look more like them.  Which, of course, I am, really.  I’m just forgiven and I’m supposed to be striving for Christ-likeness.

            That may be one reason I’m stuck on this “Groundhog Day” movie-like repetition thing.  God is saying, “You can do it” and when I show folks me instead of him, he says, “Next time you’ll get it” and moves me on. 

            I started a new job this week.  So far, I’m just a temp.  But there are several new people God has put in my path.  I have a brand new pair of ear plugs in my purse to dim the noise of 2 different hip hop stations playing on either side of me.  But I resolve to not completely distance myself from these people God has placed here.  I will look for opportunities to show them God’s grace and love at work in my life.

            Thank you, Lord, for the opportunities I know you are going to provide for me to share you.  Father, I pray my life is pleasing to you.  Cleanse me and guide me as I go forward.

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I think this is the Devotional Bible I have. 
                              And you just can't go wrong with Max Lucado.
                                                                   Get a plan.

Missed Opportunity

For the past several days, God has spoken to me about my attitude. Which at times can be puffed up. He has spoken to me about making a difference. About my circle of influence. We all have one.

I moved out of my apartment this week. I lived there for 17 months. My neighbor and I had introduced ourselves to each other and waved in passing, but never really talked or got to know each other.

She is a younger woman by 20 years. Has several tattoos, smoked a lot. And I was awoken in the middle of the night a time or two by loud fights between her and her live-in boyfriend. Through the walls of our apartment I often heard her yelling profanities at her teenagers. I determined I didn't want to be involved with this sort of person.

On moving day I knocked on her door to offer her some food from my freezer.  She ended up offering to help me with the final clean out and clean up. Through out the day we talked and got to know each other.

This young woman grew up with a mom who had a drug problem. She had 2 children as a teenager and she had a drug problem. She spent 3 years in prison and is now clean. She told me of going to church as a young teen and of her son going to church now with one of his friends.

We found we had a few things in common and could have been friends. She most likely would have gone to church with me....if I had ever asked or taken the time to get to know her at all.

I missed my opportunity. I will remember Alana for the rest of my life. Because of how I failed her or God.

Who am I that “I” should judge a person and find them not good enough for me. I never had that particular thought about her, but what I did think, I am too ashamed to share.

Heavenly Father, forgive me for exalting myself in that I felt I was better than Alana. I pray you draw her to you. Lord, show me how I can reach out to others. Lord, help me to realize that the waitress, the cashier at Wal-Mart, and my next door neighbor are ALL loved by you and put in my path so I can show them you.

Guess! Just Guess!

Yesterday I told my son that even though God has told me good things are in store for me; like every Christian, heaven, being with Jesus, the ultimate good thing is “in store” for all of us who are His. I told him, I've considered the possibility of God taking me back to the desert to show two families that I dearly love the way to the Father. You gotta know time is getting short.

               My daughters know about God, but don't know Him.

My witness has not been all that great in recent years. In fact, it's been down right bad. I want to show these 2 children of my heart and body, Jesus. I want to encourage them. Help them build a foundation of faith for their children.

I bet ya can't guess what today's subject was in my Random Book of Devotions?​ (And I never peek ahead).

Our Words Are Our Witness

Joshua 24: 22-27 in the New Century Version says:

Then Joshua said, “You are your own witnesses that you have chosen to serve the Lord.”

The people said, “Yes, we are”. Then Joshua said, “ Now throw away the gods that you

have. Love the Lord, the God of Israel with all your heart.” Then the people said to

Joshua, “We will serve the Lord our God and we will obey him.” On that day at Shechen, 

Joshua made an agreement for the people. He made rules and laws for them to follow.

Joshua wrote these things in the Book of the Teachings of God. Then he took a large

stone and set it up under the oak tree near the Lord's Holy tent. Joshua said to all the

people, “See this stone! It will remind you of what we did today. It was here the Lord

spoke to us today. It will remind you of what happened so you will not turn against

your God.

It's not enough to merely believe in the Lord. James 2:19 says “...even the demons believe”. And Matt. 11:28 says, “Yea, rather, blessed are they that hear the word of God and keep it”.

It's not that we have a bunch of do's and don'ts. But we do have a big “do”. Follow Him. We want to be more like him. How can others see Jesus in us if our life never changes? Now, the good news is the change isn't up to us. All we have to do is tell Jesus we want Him in our lives. Ask Him to come in and set up housekeeping. The rest. The changes? You leave to him. He'll guide you to changes or growth and one day you'll look up and say, “Wow! I'm not the way I was.”

Holy Father, thank you again for your word, that is alive and breathing. Thank you that you speak to me through your word. Lord, lead and guide me to the desert. Guide my words and actions. Let me be a witness to others. But especially to my girls. Show them, Lord, that you love them and want them for your own.